We had a single reason to not like Boulder before the Rocky Mountain Showdown: We go to CSU, and they are Boulder. Simple as that. You are conditioned to not like the city, the people, or the school. Anyone who goes there is a dirty hippie who smokes weed any chance they get. The town is dirty and smells. CU is subpar in a lot of ways to CSU. Hell, Boulder is subpar in a lot of ways to Fort Collins. We are very proud rams, but our pride took a beating on Saturday. We’ll get to that, though.
Pregame: We printed our sacred tickets, picked our outfits our and watched TV. Then we stayed up late doing important things like painting our nails, making brownies, and then eating the brownies. Caitlin had a mishap with some nonstick spray and the kitchen floor, which ended with her face first onto the stove clinging on to the batter bowl for dear life. Nonstick spray lives up to its name. It definitely makes sure your feet do not stick to the floor. We debated about what time to leave for the game due to the fact that we were still up at 2 am and in the end decided to get up at god awful 7 am and head down by 8:30 am.
Drive down: We got up, ate, and packed our bags. The drive wasn’t so bad until we came across 3 buses of CU students. It was obvious that we were CSU students because we were decked out in green. We were then flipped off continuously for the next 20 minutes. We have never seen so many middle fingers. Katie can’t lie; she did give a couple back. Once we found a parking lot that looked like it had some CSU fans it in, we parked and started our hike to Invesco Field where we met up with Caroline and Konnor.
Game time: We ended up all the way in the upper bowl where we could see the entire field. Then, we proceeded to break out the body paint. Caitlin got some green war pain on her face and then put a green handprint on her shoulder, her arm, legs and her stomach. Caroline stuck with just green bars on her cheeks. Katie got CSU on one cheek and RAM on the other. (There wasn’t enough room for the S to make RAM plural.) Then she painted a giant CSU on her stomach. The game started out innocently enough, and then we found out at about halftime, we had little to stand and cheer about. It was 0-14 by the half, CU had blocked a kick before to keep us at 0. Eventually we did get some points on the board, 3 of them. Yep! That’s all! THREE! The final score was 3-24. None of the student body was walking out with a big ego, or a false sense of how good our football team was. It was not a close game where we could still talk trash. It was a clear cut win for CU (yes that hurt to type). However, CU felt it necessary to still be rude. Actually rude doesn’t even describe it.
As we were walking out, silent, a CU girl had the nerve to come up and talk trash to us right outside the stadium. Then just as we were almost to the car, we came across a CSU student who was covered in blood. He had been assaulted, out of the blue, by a CU student who felt it necessary to pound in the win (no pun intended).
Now we have more reasons to not just dislike CU, but to HATE them. Now we understand why everyone was so tense and angry last year when they came into our gym causing problems during basketball. Fort Collins is our home. Here are our reasons:
1. The overwhelming smell of pot on campus
2. Everyone is a terrible driver coming out of Boulder.
3. 2 words: dirty hippies
4. You are all rich. Really. But you dress like you can’t afford anything but a paper bag because apparently that’s cool.
5. Obviously a bunch of trust fund babies who have nothing better to do with Mommy and Daddy’s money than to waste it on beer and bongs
6. CSU is superior in a lot of our schools. Where CU’s med school almost lost accreditation
7. You can chill with Cam. Ralphie will trample you.
8. Our band was WAY better.
9. Being the number 1 party school for so many years isn’t really something to be proud of
10. The fans are jerks
The last one is super important. Like Caitlin said, they can burn their brain cells our all they want and we can just be better than them, but when you get mean over an obvious win, then you fall into the “we hate you” category. There was a dirty hit in the 4th quarter and their fans couldn’t tell when enough was enough.
Now to complain about our own team: Come on. REALLY?! We spent $27 on a ticket, $15 on paint, gas money, food, drinks, and risked our lives getting in and out of the stadium and you couldn’t even show up and play a little?!?!?!?!?!? We have AWFUL tan lines (look at the pictures). We were really supportive of you the WHOLE game but give me a break. Our aching burns are worth more than 3 points.
-A Very Burned Caitlin And Katie
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